Documenting the Journey
I was in a box once. Not my usual box; this time in particular it was more of a rectangle, twice the size of my office. I sat with my back against one of the longest walls. The door was to my left, and to my right were two three-draw storage units that went the rest of the length of the wall. Above the storage was one of those office posters that read “Teamwork” or “Courage”, or something else profoundly generic. Inside the adjacent wall was a large window and a small collection of books that sat in the ledge. Against the long wall facing me, there was an L-shaped desk and another “Be Great” poster.
At the short wall to my left sat a table. There sat the director of the center, an office agent, and an outside school official from a 4-year institution. I was invited last-minute to join the conversation, so I took the seat available-against the wall. I was told that we would be discussing persistence in higher education. The director was fully aware that I had taken a break from my pursuit of a PhD in Social Psychology. His question to me-“Why do you think students not complete their degrees?”
I’d already felt weird about the absurdness of the happening, but it was this indirect/direct question that completely put me on guard. What I heard was-”Why haven’t you completed your doctorate?” Feeling targeted, I gave a bunch of reasons why someone might not complete their program, but, not my reason.
Now that the journey is being documented, here is my “Why”…
In pursuit of a doctorate degree in Psychology I considered the following 4 topics:
A mixed methods analysis on how one healthcare system positively influenced healthcare dependence.
Exploring the short and long term effects of marijuana use, as to reconsider its Schedule 1 classification.
Examining how socio-cultural norms moderate social behavior, as mediated by social power.
What is Black Love? A layered narrative on in-group relations.
My findings-1. Even when a healthcare system attempts to properly educate and promote health independence, some patients are more comfortable with pills and having others decision-make for them. And research suggests these people tend to rate their doctors higher when they get pills. 2. Marijuana is a fun and highly enjoyable substance, most effective with Lofi vibes and moderate use. The biopsychosocial benefits are plentiful, making its drug classification flagrantly inaccurate. A longer conversation is to be had on this subject. 3. The lower one’s social power, the stronger the conforming and nonconforming effects of social and cultural norms. The more dependent a person is on a system the more likely they are to conform to its norms, even when they violate ones basic human rights. 4. “Black” on “Black” violence is a real thing. It is my satirical belief that nobody hates the Black (wo)man more than Blacks. “Black” America needs it’s own BLM movement.
Our social systems need work. The process to discovering this has been impactful. I’ve lost things, including myself. I’ve discovered things, most importantly-my Self. If you do the work you will be changed, hopefully for the better. Thanks to journaling, lots of mediation, a really great friend, and never getting a bad sack-I didn’t lose it all. Now, it’s time to share our findings.
Documenting the journey is - TherapeuticLiving.